David Sellery ’92: A First-Time Pilgrim's Perspective: Constantly Surprised by Love
As a novice pilgrim to Lourdes, I came with high expectations. But nothing prepared me for sharing the healing joy with my fellow pilgrims, the sacred sense of peace that permeates that holy ground… and the palpable presence of Christ’s love I encountered at every turn.
In words and feelings that I learned from my mother-in-law, Jane Boden Muir… I was “Constantly surprised by love.” For over forty years, Jane has been the primary caregiver for my brother-in-law, John, who has quadriplegic cerebral palsy and autism. Years of witnessing her unwavering dedication and selfless care have been a constant blessing… one that flooded back to me as a first-time pilgrim to Lourdes.
Caring for John has meant a lifetime of sacrifice. Every morning this petite 77-year-old lady faces another day of constant challenges… from rigorous therapy sessions to routine lifting, shifting, bathing, and tending to his needs. Her love and devotion know no bounds. While her journey with John has been one of struggle and heartbreak… in the footsteps of Christ, it has been one of inspiring love.
In her own modest words, my mother-in-law often shares stories of how often Good Samaritans have emerged unexpectedly, offering their support and love. And the punch line is always the same: All involved are constantly surprised by love. Most memorably, she tells of vulnerable individuals who have shown immense empathy and kindness towards John, despite their own struggles. From a homeless man who lovingly engaged John at the supermarket and showed him how to feed the deposit bottle machine… to a car-wash worker who dropped everything to help lift him into the car… to the legless wounded warrior who helped him swim laps in the pool… surprising, spontaneous acts of love have become a constant presence surrounding John.
David Sellery, Class of 1992, presently serves as Director of Development and Member Engagement for the Order of Malta, The American Association, headquartered in New York City.
The Order of Malta is a 900-year-old organization active in 120 countries and dedicated to serving the aged, the sick, and those with low incomes through its hands-on medical, social, and humanitarian works. The Order champions a broad spectrum of local and international social projects which provide support and medical assistance for forgotten or excluded members of society, refugees, and those affected by natural disasters or living in the midst of armed conflicts.
Sellery’s responsibility is to identify and implement sustainable and impactful programs to engage the 1,800-person membership of the American Association in hands-on work serving the sick, those with low incomes, the unhoused, the food insecure, and the imprisoned. Annually, over 180 projects are completed, coupled with leading our capital campaign that seeks to raise upwards of $20 million over the next five years for the benefit of both the Malta Human Services Foundation and the Order of Malta Pilgrimage Foundation, they hope to double the annual grant capacity of the MHSF in support of the American Association’s local and national works, and the international works of the Order, and increase the assets in the Order of Malta Pilgrimage Foundation to a level at which the income generated by the Foundation will cover the costs for all Malades and Caregivers participating in the Lourdes Pilgrimage each year. Presently, they are approaching $19MM of their $20MM Goal.
She believes that those who are broken, face rejection, and struggle with a lack of respect… have a special gift of empathy. They are quick to reach out to others in need. John's vulnerability is a portal for the love they carry within them. In those moments, smiles are exchanged, a brief connection is made, and all parties are surprised and enriched by love. Stories of these encounters echo the parable of the Good Samaritan. Just as the Samaritan defied toxic, tribal taboos to rescue the beaten traveler, today’s “Samaritans” help John in the face of prevailing, what’s-in-it-for-me norms.
Witnessing my mother-in-law's unwavering dedication to John and listening to the Samaritan stories she shares has profoundly shaped my understanding of Christian charity. It reminds me to break free from self-absorption and embrace the healing love of Christ. This is what I experienced at Lourdes… where I was surrounded by the Samaritans of our Order… who don’t avert their eyes… who don’t walk by… who give of themselves in imitation of Christ.
In preparation for the pilgrimage, I studied the charism of Bernadette and her encounters with Our Blessed Mother. I read of the miracles that flowed from The Grotto. I marveled at the years of faithful devotion our Order has dedicated in service to the stricken. But despite all my study and prayers of preparation, when I first walked the fields, mounted the steps to the Basilica, entered the Grotto, and encountered the malades… I was totally surprised by the love that permeates the air of Lourdes.
Amidst the many awe-inspiring encounters during my pilgrimage, one story stands out in my mind… the story of Anne Peach, a member of the Board of Councilors and a fellow pilgrim who became an instrument of divine guidance. It was during a moment when we were engaged in the pre-pilgrimage set up as members of the advance team that Anne approached me, her eyes filled with gentle encouragement. She spoke of the "water ritual," an ancient practice of the baths, and encouraged me to experience healing and solace…
I followed Anne’s guidance and made my way to the baths. As I stepped into the sanctified space, a sense of tranquility washed over me. The presence of the Blessed Mother enveloped me, assuring me that this was a time for surrender and reflection. Guided by faith, I cupped the water in my hands and allowed it to flow gently over my face and neck, cleansing me physically and spiritually.
As I drank from the blessed water, I felt a profound connection to countless pilgrims who had come before me seeking solace and healing. With each sip, I offered a silent prayer, surrendering my own burdens and seeking resolution for a painful situation that weighed heavily on my heart. In that sacred moment, I felt a tangible embrace assuring me that my prayers had been heard.
The journey of healing continued as each sacred gathering offered its own unique spiritual experience. At the Anointing Mass, I witnessed the power of anointing touch as the hands of compassionate volunteers brought comfort and solace to those in need. The Candlelight Vigil lit the night with flames of hope, signaling that faith guides us through our darkest moments. The Grotto Mass let me lay my intentions at feet of Our Lady’s sacred statue.
The magnificent Stations of the Cross brought Christ's journey of sacrificial suffering vividly to life. And finally, the International Mass, brought together pilgrims from around the world in the unity of our renewed faith.
At every turn, I experienced the transformative power of Lourdes, where faith and compassion converge to create profound healing. The presence of the Blessed Mother and the intercession of the saints are alive… and abide with me today.
Returning from pilgrimage, I have my miracle… I’m changed... bound in blessed fellowship with my sister and brother pilgrims… transformed by the touch of divine grace… washed in the waters of healing… and constantly surprised by love.