IN MEMORIAM: Ralph Smith ’69
The Rev. Ralph Eugene Smith, Class of 1969, of Chapel Hill, NC died peacefully on Christmas Eve, 2022. His life story was about courageously overcoming obstacles and persevering through instability while staying grounded in his love of God, family, and friends. He was known for the twinkle in his blue eyes, his full head of hair (the envy of men), and, as a recovering alcoholic for thirty-seven years, his outreach to many caught in addiction. His favorite color was yellow, and he would raid the yards of neighbors, cutting their blooming forsythia to adorn the church on Easter. He happily stood for five hours to hear a Wagner opera, yet on his visit to an austere monastic community in France, he quickly slipped away to the nearest cafe, muttering in his southern drawl, “When do we get to Paris?!” Relishing tasty sweets, he never hesitated to ask the good cooks among his friends for cake or cookies. One of his favorite subjects to discuss was politics, which usually brought out his salty tongue.
Born in Inman, SC on June 7, 1932, to Hubert Dixon Smith and Hulda (Brown) Smith, Ralph was the ninth of twelve children, thrust into a world of scarce resources during the Great Depression. His youth was spent mostly with relatives until he moved in his teens to California to be with his mother. When she died unexpectedly, he returned to the East Coast to live with a brother on Long Island, where he graduated from Manhasset High School. He then moved into Manhattan, where, at the Church of the Resurrection on East 74th Street he found a home and a future. It was where he came to love the Episcopal Church and to live into a call to the priesthood. It was also where he met and married Margaret Ann Webb, with whom he had three sons. They were later divorced. After graduating from Hunter College, he earned an M.Div. from General and was ordained an Episcopal priest in 1969.
Ralph served parishes in New Windsor and Marlboro, NY, Detroit, MI, and North Bergen, NJ. During his years in the mid-Hudson Valley, he served as President of the Board of McQuade Children's Services for seven years and as chaplain to the Vailsgate Fire Department. He led evangelism workshops in the Diocese of New York and for the national Episcopal Church, and spent six weeks in Kenya studying the growth of the Church there. He received an S.T.M. Degree in pastoral counseling from New York Theological Seminary, then moved into drug and alcohol counseling while continuing to do interim ministry in the Dioceses of New York and Newark. In 1991 he married Susannah Rankin Hobbs, whom he met when preaching at Church of the Incarnation in Jersey City.
After retiring from active ministry in 1997, Ralph and Susannah moved to Manhattan where he continued to do interim ministry while she served at St. James' Church, Madison Avenue. In the aftermath of the 9/11 attack, he became a Red Cross chaplain, working a late-night shift in the terrible “pit.” He loved the Big Apple, where he enjoyed opera, classical music concerts, art exhibits, and meeting people from all walks of life. A familiar face and friend to many of his Carnegie Hill neighbors, Ralph always stopped to talk with doormen and dogwalkers as he walked his labrador retriever. He was often seen riding his bike around town looking, as one observer noted, like Flash Gordon.
In 2004 Ralph and Susannah moved to Chapel Hill, NC. Not one to sit home he worked in the cafe at Whole Foods for several years, making new friends, counseling the downhearted, and, as always, talking politics. He accepted another call to serve the Church as a chaplain to retired clergy and their spouses in the Diocese of North Carolina, serving as the Chair of the Chaplaincy Committee. He led religious services at the Carolina Meadows and Galloway Ridge retirement communities. At Carol Woods, the retirement community where he lived for the last five years, he was known by staff and residents as the “go to” person if someone needed prayer. At 5:00 a.m. each day he would rise to pray for others and to thank God for the blessings of this life. For ten years he experienced the advance of Parkinson's disease without complaint. When his health deteriorated to the point where he needed to live in the Healthcare Center, he was cared for by a wise, highly skilled, and devoted Carol Woods' staff who made it possible for him to live with dignity and grace despite his frailties. His family's gratitude for this exceptional care knows no bounds.
Ralph is survived by his wife, Susannah Rankin Smith, two sons, Michael (Chastity) of Prince Edward Island, Canada and Philip (Kathleen) of Port Jervis, NY. His youngest son, Stephen, died in 2020. He is also survived by his step-children, Cole Hobbs of Park City, UT, Rankin Hobbs (LuAnne) of Dallas, TX, and Elizabeth Marks (Heath) of Pittsboro, NC. He was the proud grandfather of eleven grandchildren. He is further survived by his brothers Robert, Hayward, and Morris.
The service of the Burial of the Dead will be held in the near future at The Chapel of the Cross in Chapel Hill. Contributions in Ralph's memory may be made to the Carol Woods Charitable Foundation or to the Parkinson's Foundation.
Obituary provided by the family.